Times of Refreshing.

Life is not slowing down anytime soon. There are mouths to feed, money to be earned, clothes to wash, floors to vacuum, events to attend, and so forth. I am guilty of getting so caught up in the madness of everyday life that I can turn into Robot Mom and Robot Wife.

"What is that Macy? You tried to go potty by yourself, but you had already gone in your diaper, and now there is poop all over you and the floor? Sure, let me just clean that right up."

"Oh Asher, you're hungry? Right this second? Here is some milk. Wait, you aren't hungry? You're tired? Or do you have to burp?"

"Macy, I will get you more water in just one second. No, you can't have a gum ball! Pooping in your diaper and then taking it off yourself doesn't count as going on the potty. You're hungry too?"

"Hi hunny, welcome home. I think Asher is tired, or hungry, or he just want to be held. Macy is hungry, and needs a diaper put on her. I need to go to the bathroom, wash my hands, and maybe change out of my pajamas...oh, and your mom called..how was your day?"

Now, THAT is good birth control.

It's so easy to go through the motions; forgetting to ever feel. Forgetting to just stop, just for a moment. Breath. Observe. Contemplate. And take it all in. Sigh. I am so blessed.

I have two healthy, beautiful children; an entertaining, handsome husband; a roof over our head; food in our bellies; and a God who loves me more than I could ever grasp. Blessed. Beyond blessed.

That is why I am so thankful to get the chance to 'date' my husband still. Once a week, JR and I leave the children with their Nana and Papa, and we get to go be alone, together. We go to the Young Adults bible study and then we do something after, like a movie or dinner. Last night, though, we got to do something special. We got to go spend the night in a hotel in downtown Denver, kid-free. I got all dolled up for my handsome husband. I made sure my hair was just right, my outfit charming, and that my shoes pulled the outfit all together (you know it is all about the shoes!). I wanted to look good for my groom; real good. These dates are few and far between, so when the opportunity comes about, we take full advantage.

Just him and me.

There are no diapers to be changed, no little mouths to feed, no people to call, no bills to be paid, no money to be earned. Not in this time. Not in our time. All that's left to do is renew, refresh, restore, revive and rekindle our love with each other.

It's these times of refreshing that bring me back to a slower pace of life. These times help me be a better mother to our children, and a better wife to my husband. They help me feel less robotic, and more human.

Now it is off to feed the little mouths...

Melt my heart.

Macy, I love you.



I could end this post there, and that in and of itself would sum up everything I am about to write. You, my little cupcake, are special. And that is not the, "iamyourparentsoithinkyouarespecial, kind of special." You are seriously so remarkable. God really out did himself when he created you.


You have a heart of gold. You are compassionate. You are fiesty. You are a lover. You are tough. You are so full of life. You are free spirited. You are smart. You are happy. You are a pistol. You are stunningly beautiful. You are loud. You are creative. I could go on and on about the amazing characteristics God gave you, but I am pretty sure my vocabulary doesn't span the lengths required to give your God given personality justice. Seriously. You are simply extraordinary.



Some of my most favorite memories are with you.

Tonight, I went into your room, and I found you laying on the floor, next to Toffee, sleeping. What a sight to see. You and Toffee are best friends. You always play together, and you look out for each other. He makes sure no one harms you or messes with you. And you, in return, make sure to throw him some of the food you are eating - no matter what it is. I have even caught you sitting on top of the stairs together, with your arm wrapped around him, feeding him some of your snack. You two love each other. So it didn't surprise me to find you sleeping, snuggled up next to him. You probably felt bad that he was sleeping on the floor, so you went and joined him. You are just that way. I love it, and I don't ever want to forget it.

Forget me not.

I have had a few epiphanies lately. The first being that I have the worst memory e.v.e.r. Just ask my husband. Or any of my close friends. They will all look at me, and say "Remember when...?" And 90% of the time, I just don't remember. I come by it honestly. Its not like I want to forget. Its just one of my few flaws. Ok, fine, my many flaws.

I just hate that I am going to forget all these memories that are created every single day. I want to remember. I want to be able to tell my children stories of themselves. I want to reminiscences with JR when we are old and grey about the struggles, joys, heartache, love, laughter, and pain we experienced. I want to remember how I felt, how things smelled, how things looked. I don't want to leave it up to some brain, that is incapable of remembering what I ate for breakfast, to clearly remember and retell events that are so significant.

So this, dear blog, is why I have pulled you out of the bookmark that I threw you in a year and a half ago, and decided to dust you off and start writing, ahem, typing out my memories, my life, so that I don't forget.

You know, life is too short. We aren't guaranteed tomorrow. And I know, I know that it would crush me if something, God forbid, happened to any of my beloved, and I struggled to remember certain things about them. Hopefully you, dear blog, will help alleviate some of that burden.

I am not sure that I will make this public yet. I want to get comfortable in my space. I want to find my groove. I want to write for me, for my family, first and foremost. I don't want the added stress of writing to readers, yet anyway. So, for now, it is just me and this blog. Let the memories roll baby!